I went to my linked in account to update my job requirement classes that I had taken. I NEVER go on linked in. HIM and I were contacts on linked in and he deleted me a long time ago, (before we ended our relationship) because he thought his wife would see it. Well he is no longer listed as a contact BUT his update (which confuses me) I was able to see. It said that he had an interview the next day that he hoped he’d get the job. My heart sank.
I want him to work more than I want him in my life. I can’t imagine the stress in a marriage or house when there is no income. I don’t want that for him. I don’t want him to hurt or stress in anyway. I don’t want stress in his marriage or home because that wears on him.
I can’t tell you seeing his words next to his picture, how that felt. Butterflies flew from my stomach up into my throat and filled my eyes with tears. It was CRAZY. I was speechless. My nose burned where tears were being held back. My heart instantly ached.
WHY can I see his updates if we are not contacts? Please someone tell me. I looked I have no way to make my posts ‘seen’ by people I am not contacts with… and if you choose ‘everyone’ I would see EVERYONE’s posts that were available to see and I don’t, I see the updates/comments from my contacts and him. I am so confused. And sad. And emotional. And lost. And hurting. Again. Like a new fresh wound. Ripped open all over again.